Human Tendencies: Why Montessori Still Feels So Relevant

Meagan Ledendecker • October 6, 2025

When Dr. Maria Montessori was observing children’s development, she wasn’t just focused on how they learn in the classroom. She was curious about the drives, instincts, and patterns that have shaped humans across time.


These human tendencies are the forces that have guided our species since the very beginning, helping us adapt, survive, and thrive. And when we recognize them in children, we can create environments that don’t fight against human nature, but flow with it.


Here’s a closer look at some of these tendencies, and how they show up in both history and our children’s lives.


Orientation



At its root, orientation literally means turning toward the east and the rising sun. For early humans, orientation meant survival through knowing where to find water, food, or shelter, as well as recognizing the stars and using them to navigate.


As adults, we still crave orientation when we move to a new place, start a new job, or even visit an unfamiliar store. We rely on guides, rituals, and familiar touchstones to help us settle.


Children, too, need orientation. The way they’re welcomed on their first day in a classroom, where they put their belongings, what routines they can count on—all of this helps them feel secure. Even a simple “good morning” is a daily act of re-orientation that matters more than we sometimes realize. Children look for orientation in daily rhythms: the bedtime routine, knowing which shelf holds their favorite books, or even how breakfast is served each morning.


Exploration


From the moment we are born, we explore. Infants use their mouths, eyes, and hands. Toddlers climb stairs like they’re scaling mountains. Older children explore through research, imagination, and adventures into both history and science.


Exploration is how humans pushed across continents, learned to farm, crossed oceans, and now even travel into space. Our curiosity never stops. Montessori environments honor this by giving children real opportunities to investigate the world, whether that means calculating the area of the classroom or researching life in the Carboniferous period. We see our children exploring as they turn over rocks in the backyard, take apart a toy to see how it works, or invent new rules for a favorite game.


Order


We all know the relief of an organized kitchen drawer or a well-structured calendar. Order helps us make sense of life. For early humans, ordering the world by figuring out what was safe versus unsafe or edible rather than poisonous ensured survival.


Young children need physical order. Anyone who’s seen a toddler melt down because their bedtime story was read “out of order” or because the blanket wasn’t arranged in just the right way knows this is real. Montessori classrooms respect this sensitive period by offering environments that are consistent and predictable. At home, you may notice your child lining up toy cars, insisting on a particular bedtime ritual, or sorting stuffed animals by size.


By the elementary years, order shifts into the mental realm. Children now want to classify animals, chart types of mountains, or debate the “rules” of their group. They’re learning not just order in things, but order in ideas, logic, and morality. You’ll see this at home when children organize their collections, invent complicated rules for backyard play, or argue passionately about fairness.


Self-Control


Self-control has always been key to survival. Hunters had to move silently. Communities relied on cooperation. Today, self-regulation is one of the biggest predictors of success in school and life.


In Montessori environments, self-control grows naturally: waiting for a material to become available, choosing the right time to speak, or practicing social courtesies. When children find deep concentration in meaningful work, that sense of inner discipline blossoms. We may notice our children waiting patiently to blow out birthday candles, saving allowance for a bigger purchase, or calming themselves after a disagreement with a sibling.


Imagination


Imagination isn’t just for artists. It’s what allowed early humans to picture tools before they were built, imagine migration routes, or dream up stories around a fire.


For children, imagination expands exponentially in the elementary years. Suddenly, they’re not only absorbing the world, they are imagining other worlds. Dinosaurs, outer space, ancient civilizations, atoms…nothing is off-limits! Montessori taps into this by giving children the universe itself as their curriculum. Imagination at home might unfold through elaborate pretend play, story writing, or inventing new games with household objects.


Abstraction


Abstraction is the ability to pull an idea from an experience. Early humans drew symbols on cave walls. Today, we live in a world of abstractions: math, laws, justice, and freedom.


Children naturally move toward abstraction, but only after being fully grounded in hands-on experience. Montessori materials are designed as “materialized abstractions,” allowing children to build concepts with their hands before holding them in their minds. We see children developing abstraction when they begin to understand time (“after lunch,” “in three days”), use symbols in drawing or writing, or play games that rely on imaginary rules.


Activity, Work, Movement, and Experience


Humans are doers. From stone tools to skyscrapers, everything we know about early humans comes from their work. Dr. Montessori believed, echoing Kahlil Gibran, that “work is love made visible.”


For children, work isn’t drudgery. Rather, work is joy. Whether pouring water, building long math equations, or researching volcanoes, children grow through purposeful activity. Movement is not a distraction from learning, but a pathway into it. Children eagerly help bake, sweep, carry groceries, or build forts. This is joyful work that feels both purposeful and fun.


Repetition


Watch a toddler stacking blocks again and again, or a preschooler repeating a pouring exercise 40 times in a row. Repetition for young children is how they achieve a deep sense of mastery.


Older children still repeat, but they do it differently. They elaborate, amplify, and push concepts further: instead of practicing small sums, they’ll dive into giant multiplication problems just for the thrill of it. At home, this shows up when our children want the same story read every night, practice a cartwheel over and over, or endlessly build new versions of the same LEGO design.


Exactness and Self-Perfection


Humans have always needed exactness, whether it was a sharp spear or a stable bridge. Children share this drive. They beam when their handwriting is neat, or when they finally get something just right.


Linked to exactness is the tendency toward self-perfection. Children don’t just want to do it. They want to do it well. You see this tendency in the toddler learning to zip a coat, the elementary child striving to be fair, or the adolescent wrestling with big moral questions. The tendency shows up when our children insist on re-tying their shoelaces until they’re perfectly even, redoing a drawing until it’s just right, or correcting themselves when they mispronounce a new word.


Communication and Belonging


At the heart of it all is our need to connect. Communication, whether through language, art, music, or technology, has always been how we share knowledge and emotions. Belonging is what makes us human, and we create this connection in various ways, joining together in families, tribes, clubs, or communities.


Children live these tendencies out loud. They talk endlessly, write stories, create clubs, and invent games. Classroom and family rituals, shared meals, whispered secrets between siblings or friends help children know they belong.


Why This Matters


These human tendencies remind us that education isn’t about filling children with information. It’s about nurturing what is already inside them.


When Montessori said we should “follow the child,” she wasn’t suggesting we leave them to wander aimlessly. She meant we should pay attention to these deep, universal drives and prepare environments where these drives can manifest in positive ways.


Because when children’s natural tendencies are honored, they don’t just learn. They grow into the kind of humans who can orient themselves in a new world, explore with curiosity, build with order, imagine boldly, and belong with others in peace.


Visit our school here in Lenox, MA to see how Montessori deeply connects with what it actually means to be human so that children can flourish in beautiful ways!

By Meagan Ledendecker February 23, 2026
One of the quieter, less visible practices in a Montessori elementary classroom is the Child-Guide conference. You may never see it listed on a schedule or mentioned in a weekly update, yet it plays a profound role in children’s experience at school. Relationship Comes First The primary purpose of these conferences is to establish, maintain, and strengthen the relationship between the adult and each child. This focus shifts the dynamic from a teacher looking for faults or scolding about unfinished work. Rather, it’s a collegial conversation that enables children to take an active and engaged role in their own education. These connective conversations are grounded in relationship-building because when children feel emotionally safe and genuinely respected, they are far more willing to reflect, stretch themselves, and take responsibility for their growth. Every Child, as Often as They Need Montessori Guides aim to meet regularly with every child, but what “regularly” looks like can vary based on individual needs. Some children benefit from a longer, more formal conference every few weeks. Others need brief, frequent check-ins, sometimes lasting only a minute or two. These short moments might look like a quick conversation at the beginning of the morning, a gentle pause beside a table, or a quiet walk across the room together. The length of the meeting is not what matters. What is important is the message it sends: “I see you. I know your work. I care about how this is going for you.” What Happens in a Child-Guide Conference? While conferences vary based on each individual and the moment, they often include: The child bringing their learning journal or work (finished and unfinished) The guide bringing observational records A shared look at what has been accomplished Gentle reflection on what still feels unfinished Planning for what might come next Scheduling new lessons or presentations Support with larger projects: breaking them into steps, mapping timelines, imagining the finished product This collaborative time also provides an opportunity to experiment with new strategies (“Would you like to try creating a prioritized list?”), celebrate successes (“You worked so hard on your presentation! How did it feel to share your work?”), and reflect upon challenges (“It seems like you’ve been feeling a bit stuck in your research project. Tell me more about what is going on.”). Learning to Define “Finished” One of the most freeing lessons children learn in Montessori is that not every piece of work must be finished to an adult’s standard. Sometimes children accomplish exactly what they set out to do, and continuing would add nothing meaningful. Other times, interest has naturally ended, and letting go is healthy. This is not about lowering expectations. It is about honoring children’s internal sense of completion and learning when to release what no longer serves a purpose. Trusting Children’s Self-Assessment A cornerstone of these conferences is trust. Guides listen carefully to how children assess their own work and articulate their goals. When an adult truly accepts children’s self-assessment, something powerful happens: children begin to see themselves as capable, thoughtful, and worthy of being taken seriously. Children often receive more from the tone and sentiment of these meetings than from the actual content discussed. The Whole Child Matters Because Montessori education is concerned with the whole child, conferences may naturally move beyond academics. A Guide might gently offer support with social dynamics or ask about recent struggles during outdoor time. These moments provide a safe space for children to reflect on their own social, emotional, and physical development, and to recognize that there is a network of support. When Relationships Need Repair Even in the most thoughtful classrooms, relationships can become strained. What matters is how adults respond. It is never too late for a Guide to sit with a child and say, honestly: “I’ve been thinking about how we’ve been interacting recently, and I’d love to brainstorm with you about what I could do differently.” When an adult takes responsibility, without demanding the child do the same, something shifts. Trust begins to rebuild. Real dialogue becomes possible. Children learn from this modeling. In time, after they feel safe, they often step forward to take responsibility themselves. What Children Are Really Learning Through these quiet, intentional meetings, children learn that:  their thoughts and feelings matter, adults can be trusted, mistakes are part of growth, reflection leads to independence, and relationships can be repaired. And while these conferences may happen quietly in a corner of the classroom, their impact echoes far beyond it. This is true preparation for life. To learn more about the long-term benefits of Montessori, visit us here in Lenox, MA!
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