Our Gifts to Children

Meagan Ledendecker • November 27, 2023

The brain of a young child works differently than the brain of an adult. Sensorial experiences shape children’s brains, forming neurological webs that last throughout their life. 


The fact that our interactions with young people help shape their future selves opens up an incredible opportunity. Each experience can be a gift. Often the simplest moments can carry the most meaning.


During the rush of this season, we have the opportunity to slow down and really be present with the young children in our lives. By being open to the wonder and delight our children experience, we gain new perspective while also giving the best gift of all: our total attention. 


This may mean taking a deep breath and momentarily turning off the chatter of the to-do list, squatting down to a child’s eye level, smiling, and just listening or seeing what they want to share. A helpful holiday mantra can be: Talk less. Listen more.


In addition to giving our full attention, whether for 20 seconds or 20 minutes, we can also offer to teach a young person a new skill. The key to these teaching moments is to focus on each distinct step so the skill is simple and attainable. Even very young children can be involved with tasks like setting the table, wrapping gifts, and tending to simple household maintenance. They appreciate being involved with routine activities and they want to contribute in a meaningful way.


Dr. Jane Healy, author of numerous books, including Your Child’s Growing Mind, reminds us that children need the opportunity to repeatedly practice activities that seem second nature to adults: “Self-help skills and household jobs are very important for the child to master–help your child, but encourage him to do it himself even if the job isn’t done exactly your way!”


When encouraging or supporting a child in trying a new skill or participating in a new task, be sure to take the child’s perspective into account. Showing how to do something is often the most effective and verbalized instructions can be kept to a minimum. In fact, it is best to not talk while showing something and to not show something while talking! This allows the child to focus on absorbing one kind of sensory input, thus keeping the information clear in their mind. 


These kinds of ordered and clear experiences are key to a child’s development. “Impressions do not merely enter his mind; they form it,” explained Dr. Maria Montessori a physician turned educator who spent intensive time observing children, making scientific notes, and thus coming to an enlightened understanding of childhood development.


Dr. Montessori observed how children respond positively to organization, both in terms of expected routines and physical space. Current research, such as that comparing the HOME inventory (Home Observation for Measurement of the Environment) to longitudinal information collected in the Bayley Mental Development Inventory, shows that organized environments lead to higher intelligence scores.* 


We all know that the holiday season throws our routines and even our physical settings a bit askew. With this in mind, children benefit greatly from adults in their lives maintaining a calm sense of order during this busy time. 


In order to create a calm, ordered environment, we ourselves need to have balance and clarity in our own lives! Staying present in the moment, breathing deeply, and ultimately taking care of our own needs allows us to offer our best selves to the children around us. 


What we offer to our children, in terms of our presence, special activities, or toys, can provide opportunities to aid their development. During this time of gift-giving, for example, we can provide objects that have an intelligent purpose and help children contribute in a meaningful way to the order around them. Child-sized, yet real, items are particularly valuable: cooking tools, building tools, yard tools, and even mops and brooms. 


Children don’t stay young for long, and the early years are extremely formative. In her book, Understanding the Human Being: The Importance of the First Three Years of Life, Silvana Quattrocchi Montanaro explains the significance of a young child’s experiences: “Everything that comes from the environment is received, processed and stored in the brain cells with no effort using a form of unconscious absorption. This intense mental activity is always going on, even in prenatal life, and it characterizes ‘the absorbent mind’.” 


For those interested in learning more about optimal environments for these “absorbent minds,” schedule a visit to our school. We can share more about setting up home environments that best support child development and show how our learning environments are specifically designed for neurological growth.


Knowing that the young children around us are absorbing everything about their surroundings, this season let’s give them our attention, meaningful ways to contribute to daily tasks, and a calm, ordered environment. As a result, we’re helping some remarkable young people as they develop into capable, caring young adults.


*For more information on this research, check out the book, Montessori: The Science Behind the Genius by Angeline Stoll Lillard.

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One of her core observations was that children naturally gravitate toward curved, flowing lines rather than the rigid, straight strokes that were (and often still are) the starting point for teaching print. She noticed this pattern across multiple contexts. When children who were learning to write began with rows of straight strokes, their attention would gradually drift, and the straight lines would slowly transform into curves, as if the child's hand were following its own natural inclination. And when children drew spontaneously by tracing figures in sand with a fallen twig, or scribbling freely on paper, they rarely produced short, straight lines. Instead, they made long, flowing, interlaced curves. Dr. Montessori paid attention. Rather than something random, she recognized the hand's natural motion expressing itself. Critical of standard teaching approaches that began with isolated geometric strokes, or regimented mark-making, Dr. Montessori saw that cursive script, with its connected, flowing letters, aligned far more naturally with the motions children were already making. It worked with the child's hand, rather than against it. The Neurological Case for Cursive Thanks to her keen observations, Dr. Montessori intuited benefits that research is now beginning to confirm. Modern brain science provides a compelling case for the value of cursive writing. This is especially powerful in early childhood, when the brain is forming the connections that will support reading, fine motor coordination, and cognitive development for years to come. Dr. William R. Klemm, writing in Psychology Today, summarized findings showing that learning cursive trains the brain to develop what researchers call “functional specialization,” or the capacity for optimal efficiency. Brain imaging studies show how multiple areas of the brain are activated simultaneously during cursive writing in a way that doesn't happen with typing or print. The integration of sensation, movement control, and thinking that cursive requires appears to support broader cognitive development in genuinely significant ways. Klemm also suggested that learning cursive trains the brain for more effective visual scanning, with potential benefits for reading speed and hand-eye coordination. In other words, the child who traces cursive sandpaper letters with their fingertips is developing neural pathways that support a wide range of future learning. Clarity, Beauty, and the Practical Benefits Beyond the neurological research, there are practical reasons that Montessori educators have observed over generations of practice. Cursive provides a better visual distinction between letters that are easily confused in print. Think about the pairs that trip up so many young learners: b and d, p and q. In cursive, these letters look different from one another, which reduces the visual confusion that causes so many children to struggle in the early stages of reading and writing. And then there is the matter of beauty, something Dr. Montessori took seriously in everything she prepared for children. She wrote that, in teaching writing, we should pay close attention to "the beauty of form" and "the flowing quality of the letters." Cursive handwriting, when developed well, is genuinely lovely. It is a form of penmanship that connects children to a long tradition of human expression through the written word. The Montessori approach treats handwriting as a craft worth caring about. What This Looks Like in the Classroom In a Montessori early childhood environment, the path to writing begins long before a child picks up a pencil. 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